Life constantly throws challenges at us. How do we deal with a difficulties in our relationships? Deaths in the family? Moving away from those who have cared for us for so long? True, there is no manual on life. We all have to come to grips with the changes we face in our own way.
Within the last two weeks, I have faced my own challenges and have tried to be a friend to those facing their own. In my life, I have graduated from grad school, entertained 50 of my closest friends and family at a wedding reception, and moved to a new city in a new state. Outside of my life, my core family is adjusting to me being away, two of my friends are confronting major decisions with their relationships, and another is battling with a major snafoo at her college. When so much can change so soon, how do we keep moving? I don't have all the answers, but I do have some suggestions:
1. Keep Busy. The worst thing you can do is nothing, because then all you think about is how you could have changed things, or how daunting the whole situation is. Find a hobby. And I don't mean video games or books. Get active, join something, start something, be social. Get out of the house and experience life as it happens around you. By getting some fresh air, you might also get a fresh perspective.
2. Talk it out. However works best for you, get your feelings out. This could take the form of blogging, talking to a close friend, or just standing in the mirror and putting all of your feelings into words. By getting the emotions out, you'll be able to verbalize the issue and see a solution even easier.
3. Love yourself. Finally, don't forget about you. Be a little selfish sometimes. When we're trying to get over a major change that has happened in our lives, we can become self-pitying and lose sight of all that we did and loved before that thing happened. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself, go ride your bike or invite some friends over. Ice cream always helps me (in moderation). Remember all the things you used to do before and do them. All of them. Love you and grow as a person. You are you, not the thing that happened to you. Realizing that is one of the best ways to get past a catastrophe.
This is no where near an exhaustive list, but hopefully this can help you. This post is dedicated to all of the friends and friends of friends who have been going through it in the last few weeks. Keep your head up, go do something, verbalize what you're feeling, and love yourself. Peace.
2 comments:
Toni, I have enjoyed reading your blog. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
When I moved TN it was a very difficult transition- married the night before we moved! And, it was a conscious decision to be active and to embrace my new community. ...yes,"get out of the house and experience life . . ." Theresa
I really appreciate this post. I have been going through a lot of stuff in the past few weeks, as you know. Sometimes it's easy to be in a relationship and forget who you are as a person. Thank you, because reading this blog has helped reinforce the great advice you always give.
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