As a woman myself, I know that there are things we fret over that never cross the minds of our male counterparts. We think about if the milk has gone bad, if the bed was made, did we take all the vitamins and pills we were supposed to take and what will happen if we haven't. Silly things that really shouldn't occupy so much of our time. But the one thing that I believe all women shamefully obsess over is our bodies.
Being self-conscious is not just a western thing. Women across the world engage in different rituals to make their bodies look a particular way. Although it is less practiced, there is foot binding in some parts of Asia. There is also the practice of neck extension by use of rings in some African and Asian cultures. More contemporary women turn to a myriad of skin products, fad diets, and plastic surgery to get the bodies they have always wanted. But, when its all said and done, no women is ever 100% satisfied with the way they look in a mirror 100% of the time.
If this is the case, and I'm sure most/all women can attest to the fact that it is, then why do we spend so much time being interested in how we look? I can't help but find the source in our romantic/intimate interactions. I can't say that it is men who have "made us this way". For women who are attracted to other women, it seems like it would be even more difficult, trying to make yourself attractive to someone with the same set-up at you. But why are we so obsessed with attracting someone by using false advertising? Better yet, why are we still so obsessed with our bodies even AFTER we have finally snagged someone we claim to love and care about?
Granted, I am speaking from a place of privilege here. I have been blessed to find someone who loves me on my best and worst days. I have someone who has seen my weight fluctuate, my face break out, and my "morning face". Sometimes I do get a bit self-conscious, just for my own sake. But when I really think about it, I remember how silly it all is. I love me for me, every inch, pound, and pimple of me. Because I know that I cannot love anyone else before I love myself.
Those who matter don't judge, and those who judge don't matter.
2 comments:
You make a lot of good points Miss Jones. It's hard because you never how others perceive you out there, ya know. Women want all guys to think they are attractive but we have to realize different guys have different taste and you may be attractive to one guy but not to another. Don't get me started on how plastic surgery has gotten out of control in this country. You are right, the most important thing is to love yourself and when you find the right guy he will love you on your good days and your bad.
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